Fertility
IVF failed: what to do next
A negative result after IVF can knock the ground out from under you. Here's how I'd think about the weeks after, and which questions are worth bringing to your clinic.
If your IVF failed, the first thing to do is nothing in a hurry: give yourself time to take in the news before you decide on the next step.[1] Then book a follow-up with your clinic, ask why this cycle may not have worked and whether another try makes sense for you, and look at the support you have around you.[1][2] If several transfers have failed, ask whether a closer review is worth doing.[3]
I meet many people at this exact point. Some come a few days after the result, others after their third attempt. What I hear most often is not a question about medicine. It’s “I don’t know what to do with myself right now.”
Give yourself time first
The HFEA, the UK’s fertility regulator, puts it simply: getting the news that a cycle didn’t work can be devastating, and it’s natural to feel disappointed.[1] It recommends giving yourself time to come to terms with it and giving your body a chance to recover.[1]
1177 (Sweden’s public health information service) writes that going through IVF is stressful for most people, and that most clinics have counselors and experienced staff who can offer support.[2] Sometimes it also helps to talk to a counselor or psychologist.[2] The NHS recommends counseling for anyone having IVF, before, during and after.[4]
You don’t have to decide anything in the first week. Grief, anger, numbness and a need to plan right away can all show up, sometimes in the same afternoon.
Questions to bring to your clinic
The HFEA suggests talking to your clinic about why the cycle didn’t work, and asking for an honest opinion on whether further attempts may work for you.[1] It helps to write the questions down before the appointment, because it’s easy to forget them in the room.
Questions many people bring:
- What do you think happened in this cycle, and what don’t we know?
- Would you change anything next time, for example the protocol or the medications?
- Do we have frozen embryos, and what would using them involve?
- Are there investigations you’d suggest before the next attempt?
- How do you see our chances, honestly?
- How long should we wait, medically, before the next cycle?
If you’d like help preparing, bring your lab results and notes to me. Going through them together often makes it easier to see which questions matter most for you.
When IVF has failed 3 times
“IVF failed 3 times” is one of the most common things people search after a negative result, and it’s a heavy place to be. There’s no fixed number of attempts after which something is “wrong.”
In 2023, ESHRE, the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology, published good practice recommendations on recurrent implantation failure.[3] Instead of a set number, it uses a threshold: when the predicted chance of implantation over your transfers has passed 60% without success, it’s reasonable to look more closely. Below that threshold, the recommendation is generally to continue with another cycle.[3]
According to ESHRE, a review can include:[3]
- lifestyle factors for both partners, such as smoking and body weight
- an assessment of the uterus, for example with 3D ultrasound or hysteroscopy
- blood tests in some cases, such as thyroid function or antibodies linked to blood clotting
ESHRE also notes that the evidence that lifestyle changes improve IVF outcomes is limited, and that several tests offered in this situation are not recommended.[3] Which investigations fit you is a decision for your clinic.
How many attempts you get in Stockholm
According to 1177, clinics connected to Region Stockholm offer up to three IVF attempts with egg retrieval. Women generally need to be 25 to 39 years old, and men 25 to 55.[2] Between 1 August and 31 December 2026, some people who had IVF through the region in the past two years may be offered three more; the first step is to contact the clinic that treated you.[2]
If you want to continue beyond that, you can go to a private clinic, but then you pay the full cost yourself.[2] Your clinic can tell you how your own possibilities look.[2]
What’s worth looking at in the meantime
The NHS lists lifestyle factors, such as smoking and drinking alcohol, among the things that can affect IVF.[4] ESHRE recommends reviewing them for both partners after repeated failures.[3] These are areas where you have some say, and many people describe that as a relief after weeks of feeling that everything was out of their hands.
In the time between cycles, I often work with:
- sleep, which is often the first thing to go during IVF
- stress, and what actually helps you rest
- food that’s regular and nourishing, without strict rules
- your cycle, and what you notice in it
Many people also ask me about acupuncture before their next cycle. I want to be honest: the European fertility society ESHRE does not recommend acupuncture, Chinese and herbal medicine or other complementary therapies as IVF add-ons, and it describes the evidence on whether acupuncture improves IVF results as contradictory.[5] I go through the research in more detail in acupuncture and IVF. Some people still choose it as a quiet hour in the middle of everything, without expecting it to change the result.
How I work in parallel with your clinic
Your clinic is in charge of your IVF: medications, timing and every medical decision. I work alongside it.
At a first visit, we go through your story: earlier cycles, sleep, stress, food, digestion and lab results. You get a written plan, which can include advice on food and sleep, acupuncture, herbs and supplements. Before I recommend any herbs or supplements, I go through every medication you take, and questions about your protocol always go to your clinic.
The first visit is 60 minutes and costs 3,500 SEK, at Kommendörsgatan 9 in Östermalm or online, in English or Swedish.After your first visit you can book follow-ups one at a time or as a set of 3 or 5. You’ll find every option on prices, and more about my approach on fertility support. If you’re not sure where to start, there’s a free 15-minute call on Tuesdays between 1 and 2 pm.
When to see a doctor
Contact your fertility clinic right away, or 1177 outside its opening hours, if you have any of these after a cycle:
- severe pain in your belly or pelvis
- very heavy bleeding, or bleeding that worries you
- a swollen belly, rapid weight gain or difficulty breathing
- a fever
Contact your vårdcentral (local primary care clinic) or 1177 if low mood, anxiety or sleeplessness doesn’t lift after a few weeks, or if you have new, severe or unclear symptoms. If you have thoughts of harming yourself, or in any other emergency, call 112.
Sources
- HFEA (Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority). Coping if treatment doesn’t work. Accessed 2026-11-09. https://www.hfea.gov.uk/treatments/explore-all-treatments/coping-if-treatment-doesnt-work/
- 1177 Stockholm. IVF – provrörsbefruktning (in Swedish). Accessed 2026-11-09. https://www.1177.se/Stockholm/barn--gravid/barnloshet/ivf-provrorsbefruktning/
- Cimadomo D, de los Santos MJ, Griesinger G, et al. (ESHRE Working Group on Recurrent Implantation Failure). ESHRE good practice recommendations on recurrent implantation failure. Human Reproduction Open, 2023;2023(3):hoad023. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10270320/
- NHS. IVF. Accessed 2026-11-09. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/ivf/
- ESHRE Add-ons Working Group, et al. Good practice recommendations on add-ons in reproductive medicine. Human Reproduction, 2023;38(11):2062-2104. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10628516/
Common questions
How long should I wait before trying IVF again?
There's no single answer, and the medical timing is something you decide with your clinic. The UK fertility regulator HFEA encourages people to give themselves time to recover after a disappointment, both emotionally and physically. Many people find it helps to wait until the follow-up appointment is done and they feel ready to make a new decision, rather than deciding in the first days.
What does it mean if IVF has failed 3 times?
It can mean different things, so it's worth asking your clinic for a review. The European fertility society ESHRE suggests looking more closely once the predicted chance of implantation over your transfers has passed 60% without success. That review can include lifestyle factors for both partners, an assessment of the uterus and, in some cases, blood tests. Your clinic decides which investigations fit you.
How many IVF attempts do you get in Stockholm?
According to 1177, clinics connected to Region Stockholm offer up to three IVF attempts with egg retrieval, and women generally need to be 25 to 39 years old. Between 1 August and 31 December 2026, some people treated through the region in the past two years may be offered three more. You can continue at a private clinic, but then you pay the full cost yourself.
Can you help after a failed IVF?
I work in parallel with your fertility clinic, never instead of it. With me, we go through your sleep, stress, food, cycle and earlier lab results, and you get a written plan that can include acupuncture, herbs and supplements chosen with your medications in mind. I can't promise any result. Decisions about your next cycle stay with your clinic.
Want to know how I can help?
Book your first visit with me in Östermalm, or start with a free 15-minute call.